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TURIS. TURIS

grandfather Now, I ask you" snorted Elizabeth briskly her short-cropped grey hair.
Of a different mould was Bob, a Pan-Am pilot, with a flair for' fantasy.

Let's see if I can convince you.
Bob's flying for this South American company, see And he's running supplies to this little mining town in Brazil. There's this bit of a landing strip so and and barren you wouldn't want to know about it. One day, after they've shoved off the stores, a passenger climbs aboard. An unwashed, scruffy character if ever there was one. Instead of spraying him with Dettol and sealing off the cabin as soon as he was aboard, what must Bob do but hand over the controls and go back to talk with him. And what would a pilot and a fleabitten passenger chat about in mid-air, That's right You've guessed it Gold Because, of course, the tattered traveller was a prospector who had struck pay dirt. A spot of fast talking about the clouds and by the time they landed, Bob was part-owner of a Brazilian goldmine.

And what use is a goldmine without a house - at least within travelling distance You and 1, poor clots, would have called up the local estate agent. Not so Bob. It just so happened that he ran across this fabulously rich 83-year old Spanish grandee, who had" just married a beautiful teenage Senorita and built her a 50-room hacienda surrounded by rolling grasslands. When the Senorita,' stamped her tiny foot and refused to quit the bright lights, the hacienda came up for grabs. And guess who grabbed.
So now he had a goldmine and a Spanish hacienda in Brazil what more could a man want

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What Bob wanted was an ostrich egg. Well, he didn't know it at the time, but one day while he was riding out to his goldmine, he was accosted by a beggar wanting to sell him an ostrich egg. Does Bob tell him to get his head read No sir Bob stops his mule and, buys the egg. (Of course he was riding a mule What did you think he would ride - a unicorn) Anyway, Bob buys the ostrich egg carries it all the way t o the goldmine and back to the hacienda, where it just so happens, his wife has a penful of hens who have
never laid an egg. Bob slips 11fie ostrich egg into one of the empty nests. His wife finds it and believes her hens have clubbed together and gone into production in A big way. She is actually phoning the Guinness Book of Records, when an uncle arrives and puts her wise.
Yarn-spinners like Bob are rare. but instant experts tend to bob up everywhere. And Bali Uas no shortage of these. Always there is someone - usually they have arrived the previous day - who is now all clued up on the culture, the religion, the economy, the language - you name it, and they'll misinform you.

And who hasn't run foul of the lad on the back-to-nature kick. Unwashed, unshorn and unwashed. "Sure I eat at the roadside stalls - anything and everything. Magic mushrooms Why not, you only live once. Unboiled water' Think nothing of it. They drink it, why can't we"
Fortunately, before You collect a dose of dysentery by following
this suicidal advice, you are bound to encounter the hygiene nut: "My deah Of course, they tell you the drinking water has been boiled - but who knows I only use it to wash my face. I always brush my teeth with Fanta, and I never travel without crackers and marmite. You're just asking for trouble if you eat the local food."

They say that travel, broadens the mind, but the Balinese, bless them, need only sit pat, 4rid the travellers will do it for them.